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PrincessPowerKoil
Joined: 29 Jul 2007
Posts: 566
Location: Imperial Lanes (Home of the F'n Ten Pin)
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 Posted: Fri Nov 23, 2007 2:36 am Post subject: The Bad Parrot |
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A young man named Douche received a parrot as a gift. The parrot had a bad attitude and an even worse vocabulary. Every word out of the bird's mouth was rude, obnoxious, and laced with profanity. Douche tried and tried to change the bird's attitude by consistently saying only polite words, playing soft music and anything else he could think of to "clean up" the bird's vocabulary.
Finally, Douche was fed up, and he yelled at the parrot. The parrot yelled back. Douche shook the parrot and the parrot got angrier and even ruder. Douche, in desperation, threw up his hands, grabbed the bird, and put him in the freezer.
For a few minutes, the parrot squawked and kicked and screamed. Then suddenly there was total quiet. Not a peep was heard for over a minute.
Fearing that he'd hurt the parrot, Douche quickly opened the door to the freezer.
The parrot calmly stepped out onto Douche's outstretched arms and said to Douche, "I believe I may have offended you with my rude language and actions. I'm sincerely remorseful for my inappropriate transgressions and I fully intend to do everything I can to correct my offensive and unforgivable behavior."
Douche was stunned at the change in the bird's attitude. Just as he was about to ask the parrot what had made such a dramatic change in his behavior, the bird continued, "May I ask what the turkey did?"
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SaucySuzy
Joined: 08 Jul 2007
Posts: 616
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| Posted: Fri Nov 23, 2007 3:31 am Post subject: Re: The Bad Parrot |
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| PrincessPowerKoil wrote: | A young man named Douche received a parrot as a gift. The parrot had a bad attitude and an even worse vocabulary. Every word out of the bird's mouth was rude, obnoxious, and laced with profanity. Douche tried and tried to change the bird's attitude by consistently saying only polite words, playing soft music and anything else he could think of to "clean up" the bird's vocabulary.
Finally, Douche was fed up, and he yelled at the parrot. The parrot yelled back. Douche shook the parrot and the parrot got angrier and even ruder. Douche, in desperation, threw up his hands, grabbed the bird, and put him in the freezer.
For a few minutes, the parrot squawked and kicked and screamed. Then suddenly there was total quiet. Not a peep was heard for over a minute.
Fearing that he'd hurt the parrot, Douche quickly opened the door to the freezer.
The parrot calmly stepped out onto Douche's outstretched arms and said to Douche, "I believe I may have offended you with my rude language and actions. I'm sincerely remorseful for my inappropriate transgressions and I fully intend to do everything I can to correct my offensive and unforgivable behavior."
Douche was stunned at the change in the bird's attitude. Just as he was about to ask the parrot what had made such a dramatic change in his behavior, the bird continued, "May I ask what the turkey did?" |
 
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katherineannaasquith
Joined: 10 Mar 2007
Posts: 1674
Location: MY OWN WORLD -Czech republic
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| Posted: Sat Nov 24, 2007 6:23 am Post subject: |
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OMG! great one
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I am NOT CRAZY ( I hope....) |
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leo
Joined: 10 Mar 2007
Posts: 2689
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| Posted: Sat Nov 24, 2007 10:58 am Post subject: |
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"So fuck the million dollar kitchen
Fuck the Al Pacino posters
Fuck the drugs, the gold, the strip poles
Fuck the homies, fuck the poses
Fuck the walls they build around them
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*Exotica*
Joined: 30 Sep 2007
Posts: 973
Location: Infinity
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| Posted: Mon Nov 26, 2007 10:33 pm Post subject: |
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shoot!
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*That~Which~Doesn't~Kill~U- Makes~ U~Stonger*
*Everythings~Nothing~Hence~Nothing ~Is~Everything*
*The~Principle~of~Choise & Authenticity ~vs.~Dutifulness*
*Insanity~is~a~perfectly~natural~adjustment~to~a~totally~unnatural~and~negative~environment* |
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